We all have an area in our life where we are not quite happy with the results, and that’s putting it mildly in many instances — be it in love, friendship, parenting, career, health, fitness, a competitive arena and so on.
It makes sense that such areas exist, as it makes sense that we harbour unhappiness in relation to them: both represent that we are not quite perfect, and that we are not quite done in a certain area of our life and so our life by extension along with our efforts in it. But, perfection might as well be death; when you are done in life, you are done with it.
Nonetheless, what often happens with such areas is that we continue to do what is wrong, we feel pain as a result of the deed, we often blame our circumstances or others about it (in short, we assume a posture of denial), and so we trap ourselves into what is often an uncanny behavioural cycle where nothing substantial changes.
Over time, we become so accustomed to the cycle that we manage the pain, the symptom, rather than treat the illness, address its root cause. Eventually, we become so effective at managing the symptom, we construct such rituals around it, that to change our actions, stances and-or beliefs is more painful than to maintain the behavioural cycle which manages our pain…
When we reach such an accustomed state with our behavioural cycles, we regularly treat those people who try to break us from them as our enemies, as interested in bringing us more pain. We confuse the harbinger of glad tidings, the messenger of life’s finest gifts, for someone who is cut from the devil’s cloth — and we do so with good reason: for it is true that our vitality and effectiveness in the world diminishes if we nurture behavioural cycles, but we are certain of the fact there will always be something we can still do! Through our behavioural cycles, we claw at life, for life.
— Life is in the action, and in having something to do.